登陆注册
37605300000124

第124章

View the first is a sea-view.--Ariel navigation.--Normal school of whales in the distance.--Isthmus of Panama.--Interesting interview with Old Panama himself, who makes all the hats.--Old Pan is a likely sort of man.

....

San Francisco.--City with a vigilant government.--Miners allowed to vote.Old inhabitants so rich that they have legs with golden calves to them.

....

Town in the Silver region.--Good quarters to be found there.--Playful population, fond of high-low-jack and homicide.--Silver lying around loose.--Thefts of it termed silver-guilt.

....

The plains in Winter.--A wild Moor, like Othello.--Mountains in the distance forty thousand miles above the level of the highest sea (Musiani's chest C included).--If you don't believe this you can go there and measure them for yourself.

....

Mormondom, sometimes called the City of the Plain, but wrongly; the women are quite pretty.--View of Old Poly Gamy's house, &c.

....

The Salt Lake Hotel.--Stage just come in from its overland route and retreat from the Indians.--Temperance house.--No bar nearer than Salt Lake sand-bars.--Miners in shirts like Artemus Ward his Programme--they are read and will wash.

....

Mormon Theatre, where Artemus Ward lectured.--Mormons like theatricals, and had rather go to the Playhouse than to the Workhouse, any time.Private boxes reserved for the ears of Brother Brigham's wives.

....

Intermission of Five Minutes.

....

Territorial State-House.--Seat of the Legislature.--About as fair a collection as that at Albany--and "we can't say no fairer than that."....

Residence of Brigham Young and his wives.--Two hundred souls with but a single thought, Two hundred hearts that beat as one.

....

Seraglio of Heber C.Kimball.--Home of the Queens of Heber.--No relatives of the Queen of Sheba.--They are a nice gang of darlings.

....

Mormon Tabernacle, where the men espouse Mormonism and the women espouse Brother Brigham and his Elders as spiritual Physicians, convicted of bad doct'rin.

....

Foundations of the Temple.--Beginning of a healthy little job.--Temple to enclose all out-doors, and be paved with gold at a premium.

....

The Temple when finished.--Mormon-idea of a meeting-house.--N.B.It will be bigger, probably, than Dodworth Hall.--one of the figures in the foreground is intended for Heber C.

Kimball.--You can see, by the expression of his back, that he is thinking what a great man Joseph Smith was.

....

The Great Salt Lake.--Water actually thick with salt--too saline to sail in.--Mariners rocked on the bosom of this deep with rock salt.--The water isn't very good to drink.

....

House where Mormons are initiated.--Very secret and mysterious ceremonies.--Anybody can easily find out all about them though, by going out there and becoming a Mormon.

....

Echo Canyon.--A rough bluff sort of affair.--Great Echo.--When Artemus Ward went through, he heard the echoes of some things the Indians said there about four years and a half ago.

....

The Plains again, with some noble savages, both in the live and dead state.--The dead one on the high shelf was killed in a Fratricidal Struggle.--They are always having Fratricidal Struggles out in that line of country.--It would be a good place for an enterprising Coroner to locate.

....

Brigham Young surrounded by his wives--Those ladies are simply too numerous to mention.

....

-> Those of the Audience who do not feel offended with Artemus Ward are cordially invited to call upon him, often, at his fine new house in Brooklyn.His house is on the right hand side as you cross the Ferry, and may be easily distinguished from the other houses by its having a Cupola and a Mortgage on it.

....

-> Soldiers on the battle-field will be admitted to this Entertainment gratis.

....

-> The Indians on the Overland Route live on Routes and Herbs.They are an intemperate people.They drink with impunity, or anybody who invites them.

....

-> Artemus Ward delivered Lectures before ALL THE CROWNED HEADS OF EUROPEever thought of delivering lectures.

___________________________________________________________TICKETS, 50 CTS.RESERVED CHAIRS, 1 DOLLAR.

Doors open at 7.30 P.M.; Entertainment to commence at 8.

____________________________________________________________->The Piano used is from the famous factory of Messrs Chicking & Sons, 653 Broadway.

The Cabinet Organ is from the famous factory of Messrs Mason & Hamlin, Boston, and is furnished by Mason Brothers, 7Mercer Street, New York.

End The Complete Works of Artemus Ward, Part 7by Charles Farrar BrowneWith a biographical sketch by Melville D.Landon, "Eli Perkins"

同类推荐
热门推荐
  • 那年守护:谁的等待错缝花开

    那年守护:谁的等待错缝花开

    我独自守候着岁月的h路轮回,等待那千年的梦,蓦然回首,青春的花,在哪烟雨蒙蒙中迷失的心,却在这和喣阳光下找到了魂,终于了悟了那埋藏已久的心,于是,我轻轻的笑了。
  • tfboys之遇到王俊凯

    tfboys之遇到王俊凯

    一场大火让苏萌萌失去了一切,却让意外的让她收获一段与偶像巨星王俊凯的爱情。
  • 那年夏天遇见了你

    那年夏天遇见了你

    十年暗恋,再遇你时,你已为人夫。十年青春,与你一同前行,我无悔。只恨自己最初未曾说出口。十年之后,我赢了她,却输了你......
  • 五彩缤纷的都市爱情

    五彩缤纷的都市爱情

    五彩缤纷的都市,形形色色的男男女女,不管你如何的奇葩,只要你是真心,付出真情,不要说什么男人,应当以事业为重,就可以逃避,躲闪爱的来临,不管找什么样的理由,理由越多,只能越说明一点,不是男人,如果你是男人,那就拿出男人的举动出来,让她看看吧!
  • 怀孕必须注意的365个细节

    怀孕必须注意的365个细节

    情绪是人的反应性心理活动的表现。从性质上说,它可以分为积极的、消极的或不确定的三种状态。这三种状态的形成,与一个人的期望值和实现值之间所表现的关系有着密切联系。比如,有一对夫妇,希望很快地顺利怀孕,但由于某种原因未能如愿,就有可能导致消极的或不确定的情绪状态产生;相反,如果这对夫妇持坦荡、乐观的态度,即使没有及时怀孕,也仍然会保持积极的情绪状态。
  • 灵与异的世界

    灵与异的世界

    有一种生物,叫灵兽。还有一种生物,叫异兽。它们,都是我们的伙伴……
  • 遗失时代

    遗失时代

    诡异的职业者,万米高空的禁忌,消失的迷雾森林……一切未知都起源于那万年前的遗失时代。世界曾发生过什么?未来又将如何展开?不属于这个世界的【智者】降临,在迷雾重重的世界之中,寻找着未知的真相。
  • 楚家海棠初长成

    楚家海棠初长成

    躁郁少女墨棠深受病痛折磨却意外解锁邻居楚清和的温柔模式,好感度飞升,收获糯米团子一枚。随着一场荒唐的再婚,墨棠平静的生活被打破。生活中出现的奇怪的人,死而复活的父亲,一桩陈年旧案,一间贴有封条的实验室……墨棠:这些都比不上我解锁的钓鱼模式。楚清和:亲,这边黑心芝麻馅了解一下哦~
  • 惊异宇宙

    惊异宇宙

    惊异宇宙,正如它的名字——惊异。这不仅仅是一本书,而是许多个故事,许多人组成的一个宇宙。这里有普通人、有超能力者、有吸血鬼、有凤凰、甚至有外星人……很多很多。这里也有很多平行宇宙,501宇宙、166宇宙等等。这里也能穿越时间线,每一年。这里就是惊异,甚至能够让你感到震撼。翻开这一页,打开一个新的宇宙。
  • 我被爱神撞了一下腰

    我被爱神撞了一下腰

    讲述大学403宿舍里四位好闺蜜的青春生活和她们走向社会后合租的闺蜜公寓。