'To-morrow morning,early,I thought -if you really wish.I am sending round to the vicar to let him know you are come.I have told him all,and he highly approves -he says it will bring our lives to a triumphant and satisfactory issue.But -are you sure of yourself?It is not too late to refuse now if -you think you can't bring yourself to it,you know?'
'Yes,yes,I can!I want it done quick.Tell him,tell him at once!My strength is tried by the undertaking -I can't wait long!'
'Have something to eat and drink then,and go over to your room at Mrs.Edlin's.I'll tell the vicar half-past eight to-morrow,before anybody is about -if that's not too soon for you?My friend Gillingham is here to help us in the ceremony.He's been good enough to come all the way from Shaston at great inconvenience to himself.'
Unlike a woman in ordinary,whose eye is so keen for material things,Sue seemed to see nothing of the room they were in,or any detail of her environment.But on moving across the parlour to put down her muff she uttered a little 'Oh!'and grew paler than before.Her look was that of the condemned criminal who catches sight of his coffin.
'What?'said Phillotson.
The flap of the bureau chanced to be open,and in placing her muff upon it her eye had caught a document which lay there.'Oh -only a -funny surprise!'she said,trying to laugh away her cry as she came back to the table.
'Ah!Yes,'said Phillotson.'The licence....It has just come.'
Gillingham now joined them from his room above,and Sue nervously made herself agreeable to him by talking on whatever she thought likely to interest him,except herself,though that interested him most of all.
She obediently ate some supper,and prepared to leave for her lodging hard by.Phillotson crossed the green with her,bidding her good-night at Mrs.
Edlin's door.
The old woman accompanied Sue to her temporary quarters,and helped her to unpack.Among other things she laid out a night-gown tastefully embroidered.
'Oh -I didn't know that was put in!'said Sue quickly.
'I didn't mean it to be.Here is a different one.'She handed a new and absolutely plain garment,of coarse and unbleached calico.
'But this is the prettiest,'said Mrs.Edlin.'That one is no better than very sackcloth o'Scripture!'
'Yes -I meant it to be.Give me the other.'
She took it,and began rending it with all her might,the tears resounding through the house like a screech-owl.
'But my dear,dear!-whatever ...'
'It is *****erous!It signifies what I don't feel -I bought it long ago -to please Jude.It must be destroyed!'
Mrs.Edlin lifted her hands,and Sue excitedly continued to tear the linen into strips,laying the pieces in the fire.
'You med ha'give it to me!'said the widow.'It do make my heart ache to see such pretty open-work as that a-burned by the flames -not that ornamental night-rails can be much use to a'ould 'ooman like I.My days for such be all past and gone!'
'It is an accursed thing -it reminds me of what I want to forget!'
Sue repeated.'It is only fit for the fire.'
'Lord,you be too strict!What do ye use such words for,and condemn to hell your dear little innocent children that's lost to 'ee!Upon my life I don't call that religion!'
Sue flung her face upon the bed,sobbing.'Oh,don't,don't!That kills me!'She remained shaken with her grief,and slipped down upon her knees.
'I'll tell 'ee what -you ought not to marry this man again!'said Mrs.Edlin indignantly.'You are in love wi't'other still!'
'Yes I must -I am his already!'
'Pshoo!You be t'other man's.If you didn't like to commit yourselves to the binding vow again,just at first,'twas all the more credit to your consciences,considering your reasons,and you med ha'lived on,and made it all right at last.After all,it concerned nobody but your own two selves.'
'Richard says he'll have me back,and I'm bound to go!If he had refused,it might not have been so much my duty to -give up Jude.But -'She remained with her face in the bed-clothes,and Mrs.Edlin left the room.
Phillotson in the interval had gone back to his friend Gillingham,who still sat over the supper-table.They soon rose,and walked out on the green to smoke awhile.A light was burning in Sue's room,a shadow moving now and then across the blind.
Gillingham had evidently been impressed with the indefinable charm of Sue,and after a silence he said,'Well:you've all but got her again at last.She can't very well go a second time.The pear has dropped into your hand.'
'Yes!...I suppose I am right in taking her at her word.I confess there seems a touch of selfishness in it.Apart from her being what she is,of course,a luxury for a fogy like me,it will set me right in the eyes of the clergy and orthodox laity,who have never forgiven me for letting her go.So I may get back in some degree into my old track.'
'Well -if you've got any sound reason for marrying her again,do it now in God's name!I was always against your opening the cage-door and letting the bird go in such an obviously suicidal way.You might have been a school inspector by this time,or a reverend,if you hadn't been so weak about her.'
'I did myself irreparable damage -I know it.'
'Once you've got her housed again,stick to her.'
Phillotson was more evasive to-night.He did not care to admit clearly that his taking Sue to him again had at bottom nothing to do with repentance of letting her go,but was,primarily,a human instinct flying in the face of custom and profession.He said,'Yes -I shall do that.
I know woman better now.Whatever justice there was in releasing her,there was little logic,for one holding my views on other subjects.'
Gillingham looked at him,and wondered whether it would ever happen that the reactionary spirit induced by the world's sneers and his own physical wishes would make Phillotson more orthodoxly cruel to her than he had erstwhile been informally and perversely kind.
'I perceive it won't do to give way to impulse,'Phillotson resumed,feeling more and more every minute the necessity of acting up to his position.
