登陆注册
33673500000042

第42章 宽容

让人奇怪的是,和别人的过错比起来,我们自身的过错往往不是那样的可恶。我想,其原因应该是我们知晓一切导致自己犯错的情况,因此能够设法谅解自己的错误,而别人的错误却不能谅解。我们对自己的缺点不甚关注,即便是深陷困境而不得不正视它们的时候,我们也会很容易就宽恕自己。据我所知,我们这样做是正确的。缺点是我们自身的一部分,我们必须接纳自己的好和坏。

但是当我们评判别人的时候,情况就不同了。我们不是通过真实的自我来评判别人,而是用一种自我形象来评判,这种自我形象完全摒弃了在任何世人眼中会伤害到自己的虚荣或者体面的东西。举一个小例子来说:当觉察到别人说谎时,我们是多么地蔑视他啊!但是,谁能够说自从未说过谎?可能还不止一百次呢。

人和人之间没什么大的差别。他们皆是伟大与渺小,善良与邪恶,高尚与低俗的混合体。有的人性格比较坚毅,机会也比较多,因而达个或那个方面,能够更自由地发挥自己的禀赋,但是人类的潜能却都是相同的。至于我自己,我认为自己并不比大多数人更好或者更差,但是我知道,假如我记下我生命中每一次举动和每一个掠过我脑海的想法的话,世界就会将我视为一个邪恶的怪物。每个人都会有这样的怪念头,这样的认识应当能够启发我们宽容自己,也宽容他人。同时,假如因此我们得以用幽默的态度看待他人,即使是天下最优秀最令人尊敬的人,而且假如我们也因此不把自己看得过于重要,那是很有裨益的。

Cookies

As I sat perched in the second-floor window of our brick schoolhouse that afternoon, my heart began to sink further with each passing car. This was a day I’d looked forward to for weeks: Miss Pace’s fourth-grade, end-of-the-year party. Miss Pace had kept a running countdown on the blackboard all that week, and our class of nine-year-olds had bordered on insurrection by the time the much-anticipated “party Friday” had arrived.

I had happily volunteered my mother when Miss Pace requested cookie volunteers. Mom’s chocolate chips reigned supreme on our block, and I knew they’d be a hit with my classmates. But two o’clock passed, and there was no sign of her. Most of the other mothers had already come and gone, dropping off their offerings of punch and crackers, chips, cupcakes and brownies. My mother was missing in action.

“Don’t worry, Robbie, she’ll be along soon,” Miss Pace said as I gazed forlornly down at the street. I looked at the wall clock just in time to see its black minute hand shift to half-past.

Around me, the noisy party raged on, but I wouldn’t budge from my window watch post. Miss Pace did her best to coax me away, but I stayed put, holding out hope that the familiar family car would round the corner, carrying my rightfully embarrassed mother with a tin of her famous cookies tucked under her arm.

The three o’clock bell soon jolted me from my thoughts and I dejectedly grabbed my book bag from my desk and shuffled out the door for home.

On the four-block walk to our house, I plotted my revenge. I would slam the front door upon entering, refuse to return her hug when she rushed over to me, and vow never to speak to her again.

The house was empty when I arrived and I looked for a note on the refrigerator that might explain my mother’s absence, but found none. My chin quivered with a mixture of heartbreak and rage. For the first time in my life, my mother had let me down.

I was lying face-down on my bed upstairs when I heard her come through the front door.

“Robbie,” she called out a bit urgently. “Where are you?”

I could then hear her darting frantically from room to room, wondering where I could be. I remained silent. In a moment, she mounted the steps—the sounds of her footsteps quickening as she ascended the staircase.

When she entered my room and sat beside me on my bed, I didn’t move but instead stared blankly into my pillow refusing to acknowledge her presence.

“I’m so sorry, honey,” she said. “I just forgot. I got busy and forgot—plain and simple.”

I still didn’t move. “Don’t forgive her,” I told myself. “She humiliated you. She forgot you. Make her pay.”

Then my mother did something completely unexpected. She began to laugh. I could feel her shudder as the laughter shook her. It began quietly at first and then increased in its velocity and volume.

I was incredulous. How could she laugh at a time like this? I rolled over and faced her, ready to let her see the rage and disappointment in my eyes.

But my mother wasn’t laughing at all. She was crying. “I’m so sorry,” she sobbed softly. “I let you down. I let my little boy down.”

She sank down on the bed and began to weep like a little girl. I was dumbstruck. I had never seen my mother cry. To my understanding, mothers weren’t supposed to. I wondered if this was how I looked to her when I cried.

I desperately tried to recall her own soothing words from times past when I’d skinned knees or stubbed toes, times when she knew just the right thing to say. But in that moment of tearful plight, words of profundity abandoned me like a worn-out shoe.

“It’s okay, Mom,” I stammered as I reached out and gently stroked her hair. “We didn’t even need those cookies. There was plenty of stuff to eat. Don’t cry. It’s all right. Really.

My words, as inadequate as they sounded to me, prompted my mother to sit up. She wiped her eyes, and a slight smile began to crease her tear-stained cheeks. I smiled back awkwardly, and she pulled me to her.

We didn’t say another word. We just held each other in a long, silent embrace. When we came to the point where I would usually pull away, I decided that, this time, I could hold on, perhaps, just a little bit longer.

同类推荐
  • 梦的解析经典超译本

    梦的解析经典超译本

    梦的解析被后世之人推崇为弗洛伊德最伟大的著作,它为人类认识自己树立了新的里程碑。弗洛伊德把梦带入科学的视野,通过对自身与他人梦境的个案研究,告诉人们梦是一个人与自己内心的真实对话,是另一层与自己息息相关的人生。在尊重原著内容与结构的基础上,采用语录体形式,直接呈现原著中的经典段落与概括性结论,省却了繁复、冗长的论证过程。
  • 真名士自风流:谢安这个人

    真名士自风流:谢安这个人

    这是一段好看而精彩的历史。跟随一代风流名相谢安的人生之路,让我们在轻松中,清晰地看到东晋那个时代精彩的大事件,以及达些事件发生的真实内幕。您将从书中看到:谢安、桓温,这些政治家高明的手段,以及那惊心动魄的斗争。淝水之战内情的详尽剖析,谢安是用什么办法,赢得了这场8万对90万的战争,最终保卫了国家?苻坚、慕容垂,这些英雄人物们,在那个精彩的时代,他们又怎样走向了各自的宿命?前无古人后无来者的魏晋风度,东晋的风流名士,谢家的才子才女,他们都有过哪些富于个性的经典故事……
  • 1984·动物庄园

    1984·动物庄园

    《1984》作者虚构了一个受极权主义统治的大洋国,全体民众处于国家的完全监视之下,屈从和无意识成了一种全体国民的心态,而自然和思想则早已绝迹;这个政权的真理部甚至篡改历史.....《动物庄园》是一部更有趣的反乌托邦政治寓言,农场中的动物进行一场革命,将压榨他们的人类驱逐出去,建立了一个平等的社会让还算有些头脑的猪做领袖......《1984》和《动物庄园》被译成60余种文字,总销量愈4000万册。
  • 肖飞诗选(勇士也抒情)

    肖飞诗选(勇士也抒情)

    李子迟,原名肖飞,生于湖湘之地,中国人民大学文学专业毕业,曾系大学教师,现居北京,自由撰稿人。著书多种。主要有《中国超级大学》、《道可道》、《战地记者》、《问世间情何物》、《谁将被淘汰》、《就业的革命》等。
  • 实用生活文库-居家生活智慧

    实用生活文库-居家生活智慧

    本书分舒适家居、一点即通、生活妙招三个板块,从家具布置、洗浴养生等方面向读者朋友介绍居家的生活智慧。
热门推荐
  • 绝世纤尘:有墨染颜

    绝世纤尘:有墨染颜

    她,湘岚萧依,佣兵一只,不算很腻害,只是让FBI哭爹喊娘罢了。可惜平常不积德,一次任务让她灰常狗血的穿越了!一睁眼,竟来到了异世大陆,然后……整个人都不好了!废物?天生绝脉?别人都可欺我辱我?哎呦我类个去,没救了没救了……可是下一秒:很好,我会让你们死的很有节奏!蓝后,这厮踩着逆天的节奏升级打怪,唰唰唰,咦?又突破了!众人吐血。神兽圣兽手到擒来!唉,又多了一只圣兽……众人当场暴毙……不过没有关系~妖孽自有天收~快看:咦!这是哪来的妖孽?喂!离我远点!某俊美如斯的妖孽:“依依~你就从了我吧~”此文一对一爽文,女强男强,皆身心干净~PS:这是偶和三个闺蜜第一次写文~可能有些瑕疵,请见谅~
  • 神域修罗战神

    神域修罗战神

    一剑出,万剑沉寂,弹指间,天翻地覆,百族并起,各国争霸。中州大陆走出一个人类少年“林枫”受尽欺凌,踏遍黄沙海洋,勤修悟道,一切从此开始……
  • 鬼步剑

    鬼步剑

    四年前,闻名天下的天剑山庄在一场大火中从江湖上消声灭迹。唯一存活下来,并且目睹凶手的天剑山庄二小姐慕容端华,随着师父逃到了偏岛。那场大火后,凶手凌轩也跌落悬崖,消失不见。给这个江湖,遗留了太多的谜团。四年后,紫斗门出现在江湖,当年的慕容端华早已经成了紫斗门的上尊大人,设计让消失的凌轩重现江湖,四年前的秘密,无奈,厮杀,阴谋,逐渐显现出端倪。(十万字不到的小小说,大家喜欢的可以看看。)
  • 雾隐之最强水影

    雾隐之最强水影

    来到火影世界的血雾之里,没有红白眼病,没有家族传承,而且身处于忍界大战前夕,和桃地再不斩就读于同一年级。秀一表示很慌,并打算先给自己定个小目标:要成为水影的男人!
  • 娇宠

    娇宠

    她是前朝的公主,也是他的掌心娇宠。他灭了她的国,杀死了她的爱人,逼死了她的父母……
  • 蜜糖影后之影后拿手软

    蜜糖影后之影后拿手软

    她是何子伊,是国内一线女星,但却被渣男抛弃,闺蜜背叛。重生浴血归来,这次她要虐渣男,影后拿得手软!但是待拿到人生中第一个影后时,一个不速之客闯到了何子伊的世界:慕言。
  • 天行

    天行

    号称“北辰骑神”的天才玩家以自创的“牧马冲锋流”战术击败了国服第一弓手北冥雪,被誉为天纵战榜第一骑士的他,却受到小人排挤,最终离开了效力已久的银狐俱乐部。是沉沦,还是再次崛起?恰逢其时,月恒集团第四款游戏“天行”正式上线,虚拟世界再起风云!
  • 英雄联盟之只手遮天

    英雄联盟之只手遮天

    人生已经跌进谷底的杨延昭,一梦醒来,发现自己回到了三年前的高中课堂。此时的英雄联盟刚刚迈入S3赛季……此时的他还没有踏上职业选手的道路……瞎子的R闪还无人知晓,剑客亚索还没有面世,狮子狗的秒人奥义还没被开发……这时的职业比赛还只停留在四一分推和POKE流的阶段……没有中二流!没有速推流!也没有点控流!没有刺客流……这是英雄联盟开始辉煌的时代,也是属于杨延昭的时代!
  • 泉原幻记

    泉原幻记

    这是一个悲惨的人,他失去了自己的躯体,他还能回到原来那幸福美满的生活吗?
  • 巫师道

    巫师道

    乱世中的沉沉浮浮,战争中的一缕希望。我巫溪在这里立誓,只要是敢挑战我的底线的人都要下地狱。无数的修士看着这个似疯魔的人都没有怀疑这句话的真假。唯有杀了我,你们才能俯瞰这个世界,但是我万古不灭。魔族的破世而出。妖族的不断逼境。神族的藐视一切。幽冥的暗中窥探。我巫溪从来只用拳头说话。魔族。妖族。神族。幽冥。你们准备好了吗?新建QQ群1043641506